Avocado Ingestion linked to back pain - Recent Studies Suggest!

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Recent studies by MIT graduate Dr. Fink Yung have proven that continued ingestion of Avocado can cause moderate to severe back pain, even with only occasional ingestion.

The study of over 100 volunteers found that small fragments of the Avocado pit, can collect and reform into a new pit, which in turn get lodged in the G7 turn of the lower intestine track. it just so happens that the G7 turn is directly beside the Sciatic nerve bundle. The continued wearing of the stuck Avocado pit against the Sciatic nerve cluster will then manifest itself in symptoms very similar to Sciatica, such as chronic back pain, especially in the morning. Such pain will even travel down the left leg causing numbness. Short term relief can be realized by exercise, especially Yoga, as this can temporarily re-situate the pit away from the Sciatic nerve cluster, but it eventually finds its way back into the G7 turn and the painful cycle starts again.

For long term relief researchers have devised a new apparatus whereby sufferers can hang upside down for 1-3 hours a day, this action causes the newly formed Avocado pit to travel back up the intestinal track, back into the upper intestine and finally after repeated treatments into the stomach where it is dissolved by stomach fluids and re-absorbed harmlessly into the body.

Researchers have made the new apparatus available to sufferers online via the following link;
https://www.nomorepain.com

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.